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A 50K Facebook Milestone and My Complicated Personal Struggle with Worthiness

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Two days ago I celebrated my 50K Facebook milestone by posting….nothing!

My 50K Facebook fan milestone has come and gone.  I didn’t celebrate and I feel like I owe you an explanation.cloth diaper geek

There’s a lot of pressure that comes with having a Facebook page with active followers.  If you LIKE Cloth Diaper Geek on Facebook I want you to know that I do not take my ability to share things with you lightly.  I keep in mind that I do not know the struggles you may be going through at the exact time a post from my page appears in your newsfeed.

  • Are you at work on a lunch break just scrolling through Facebook?
  • Are you at home on the couch with a nursing babe at your breast just passing the time?
  • Are you in the bathroom with the door closed on the verge of tears because you’re so overhwelmed or feeling alone?

Good mood, bad mood, bitch-mode, depressed, lonely, ready to shop til you drop?  I have no clue.  This worries me and is one of the reasons I steer clear of controversial topics and sensitive issues.  Your Facebook newsfeed likely has enough drama without me contributing to it.

I think about what I post as an interruption of your day and as such, shouldn’t it be a worthy one?

Some days, depending on my mood, I suppose I find more content worthy of sharing with you and other days I feel like giving you your space, maybe because it’s space I need and I know how you feel?

Is it a good idea to give your followers break when popularity and growth is based on engagement?  I have no idea, probably not.  I’m just a mother, struggling to still be my own person, trying to work from home and stay authentic.  I often feel like an unwilling participant in a popularity contest and my livelihood depends on me making the cut. The me that exists in real life likes solitude, peacefulness and quite frankly isn’t all that social.

What about a 50K Celebration?

I already organize so many events for both myself and my clients that I sometimes feel like all I do is ASK for prizes, donations, sponsorships and STUFF-over and over again!

Am I worthy of it all?

Will sponsors be interested AGAIN so soon?

What if no one responds?

What if they didn’t see the value from working with me last time?

Will people see me as just a giveaway blogger?

My real world insecurities have successfully infiltrated my online relationships and social media presence.  You might have noticed I rarely post about personal topics or real life issues, not because I don’t have those topics in draft but because I often feel too insecure to share them with you.  I need to get back to it, share more of myself, let myself be vulnerable.  Deep down I know I’m worthy, we all are, and that more personal posts have the potential to help others, but putting myself out there for both acceptance or rejection, is easier said than done – for me at least.

Having a job that requires you to be ON Facebook all the time can take it’s toll. In this case my 50K milestone came on a day when I simply just wasn’t feeling it. A huge 50K event would have been fun I am sure, but a peaced out couple of days of radio silence also felt like the right thing to do.  I still might celebrate soon with an event or giveaway (self sponsored) you’ll just have to wait and see!

I just wanted to say thank you.  Thank you for reading my 50K reflection and for being a part of my Facebook community.  Thank you for interacting, caring, sharing and sometimes shopping through the links I share.  You truly make a difference in my life and I know your patronage helps me support my family and the families of the businesses I share.

Thanks for being here.  Smooches!

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Comments

  1. Carolyn Russell says

    May 20, 2016 at 2:17 pm

    “I often feel like an unwilling participant in a popularity contest and my livelihood depends on me making the cut.”

    OH MY GOSH, YES, 10000 TIMES THIS! I always feel SO torn between the things that I’m “supposed” to do for my brand, and the things that I know I’d prefer as a reader (and as a reader, I prefer my social media feeds to stay focused on keeping up to date with my friends. That includes the bloggers I know through reading their work and have come to love, but it DOESN’T include the flash giveaways or being tagged in posts all over the place!). So I’m totally with you on everything you said. I hate feeling like I’m back in high school watching the popular kids with their social engagement rates coming so effortlessly. I guess I’ll just try to cater to the quieter kids in the background who want the information but don’t want to jump through complicated hoops to get it ;)

    But in any case, congratulations on hitting 50K! Even if you don’t feel like having a big event for it, that is definitely a huge accomplishment and you should feel proud for having achieved that :)

    Reply
  2. Maria says

    May 20, 2016 at 3:15 pm

    You are awesome!

    Reply
  3. Viv Sluys says

    May 21, 2016 at 7:25 pm

    I have learned so much about diapers/diapering from you. I definitely don’t think of you as ‘just’ a giveaway blogger. (Although I did find your blog through a giveaway).

    Reply

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I'm Jenn and I am PROUD to be the new caretaker of this amazing resource. I have found a passion not only in educating about cloth diapers but also being a strong supporter of small business. Thank you for joining me on this journey!




julie, cloth diaper geek blogI'm Julie, a former cloth diaper retailer who discovered a passion for the industry. Now, instead of selling cloth diapers, I advocate them and promote small businesses I love who sell and manufacture them. I'm the wife of a fireman and mother of three. I have a 15yr old daughter and identical twin sons who are 12yrs old.


becca,cloth diaper geek I'm Rebecca and I'm a wife, mother, and work at home mom. I enjoy things like babywearing, cloth diapering, breast feeding, and using all natural solutions in my house. I teach Spanish to my children and their friends and I also love to sing, play the guitar, paint, draw, read, crochet, knit, and sew. Most importantly, I love Jesus and I strive to follow his example.

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