Do you know what makes your kids feel loved? Just ask!
One of the perks in being a Stonyfield blogger is being asked to participate in creative and thoughtful campaigns. One of our last reequested blog posts of 2015 also happened to be one of the best.
Inspired by this recent Babble post, “The one question you should ask your child tonight“, Stonyfield encouraged us to sit down with our kids and ask them each this one, very important, question. “What makes you feel loved?” or “How do I make you feel loved?”
When I first read this prompt I immediately assumed that my twin 9yr old sons would refuse to participate. When mom works on the computer and has been known to share your photos with strangers from time to time, you might think twice before sharing your feelings with her. Nevertheless I decided to tell them I needed their answers for a blog post. To my delight, after an eye-roll or two, they each decided to humor me and answer what ever question I had in store for them.
I questioned them independently as I was curious how they’d answer without any inspiration from others.
I asked one, “How do I make you feel loved?”
His answer, “When you kiss me. When you hug me. When you put me to bed at night and when you buy me (xBox) games.” My heart melted.
Then, after privately cuddling up with the other, I asked, “How do I make you feel loved?”
His answer, “When you give me kisses. When you give me hugs. When you tuck me in at night and when you buy me stuff. Is that good?” “Perfect!” I replied, and my heart melted again.
Short, simple and sweet. I didn’t have expectations for what they’d say or how they’d say it but they both responded so effortlessly and honestly that while I could have guessed they might say that, I still feel like I learned something by asking and listening to their answers.
I’m reminded that when I’m feeling touched-out and they’re coming over for their seventeen-thousandth hug of the day that I should hug them back as if it were their first.
I’m reminded that when I’m dead tired and putting them to bed, that extra kisses, snuggles and back-tickling shouldn’t be rushed or performed begrudgingly. If the manner by which I tuck them in at night makes them feel loved then why on earth would I want to half-ass tickle their backs and secretly hope they forget to ask me to do it in the first place? Is another 5 minutes spent tucking them in really all that painful if it makes them feel loved?
I’m also reminded that they’re only young once and time is fleeting. The amount they feel loved as a child will greatly impact the rest of their lives, make lasting impressions and shape the way they go about parenting their own children in the future.
Most of all I am reminded that giving and receiving love is our family’s currency. It’s how we re-pay each other, show our appreciation for each other and help make each other feel valued. There is no such thing as too many I Love Yous, too many hugs or too-time consuming bedtime back-tickles.
Ultimately this little blog post prompt turned into quite a valuable lesson. I encourage you to ask your kids this same question today “How do I make you feel loved?” and start your New Year off by truly discovering what your little one’s love-currency is!
Thank You to Stonyfield for the inspiration. This prompt was truly a blessing. xox
I’m Julie, a former cloth diaper retailer who discovered a passion for the industry. Now, instead of selling cloth diapers, I advocate them and promote small businesses I love who sell and manufacture them.
I’m the wife of a fireman and mother of three. I have a daughter and identical twin sons.
